Monday, August 2, 2010

They’re on to us, Barack. But the (Ice Cream) Revolution is still ON!

Damn those Conservative bloggers! It’s getting harder and harder to slip things past them.

A couple of weeks ago, Barack Obama – America’s leader (wink, wink), sent a cleverly-coded message to his peeps about the upcoming revolution.

While vacationing in Maine, our wise socialist/revolutionary comrade posed for pictures, with cone in hand, outside Mount Desert Island Ice Cream shop in Bar Harbor. An astute conservative blogger, as reported by the Bangor Daily News, noted the sign’s logo – a raised fist eerily similar to the insignia attached to the Black Power movement.

According to the Associated Press; "One blogger suggested the president decided on a press shoot there to send a message to his 'core radical base.'"

Damn! They figured it out.

Yes indeed, we members of his “core radical base” got the signal. Obama purposely chose the shop because of its logo. Oh, sure, as the ice cream shop owner stressed, radio shock jock Howard Stern has a similar logo. Little does she know, Stern’s been an honorary member of our club for years. Robin Quivers, Stern’s black on-air co-host, is really the leader of our stealth propaganda wing.

We radical members thought no one would notice that Obama chose Bar Harbor Maine -- a place with only 12 black residents – to send the coded pre-revolution message. We thought only black party members understood the significance of the ice cream flavor and cone. Obama chose coconut to let alert ballsy, cocoa-colored people that it’s “our time.” His purposeful rejection of the traditional, blond sugar cone for the BROWN, upside down pyramid-shaped cone signaled our brethren of African descent that the moment is ripe indeed to slurp our way to world domination.



The web site, "The Awl” appropriately summed up Obama’s ice cream communique: “First the "New Black Panthers" wouldn't let nice white people vote. (or something!) Now this ice cream shop in Maine is racist. It is probably run by Shirley Sherrod! And Obama went there of course for secret black power meetings with Bill Clinton and NATO and whatever Jews they could find.”

Maybe it was tongue-in-cheek commentary. Or, maybe they got it right -- all except the part about Jews being part of our secret black power meeting. It was no accident that Obama stopped to greet a group of German exchange students. He shook their hands, posed for pictures and (gasp) spoke their language. Only those of us in the know understand that usage of the word “Guten tag” was a extension of multi-national solidarity.


We’ve been exposed. Thankfully, our liberal, left wing media machine is already downplaying the incident and working to make conservative bloggers seem delusional and paranoid. It is all part of the brilliant, sophisticated yet subtle plan of our Half Blood Prince.

We received your message, oh Great One. With scoops in hand, we stand at the ready for your next signal! Hazelnut in Harlem! Chocalate Chip in Chicago -- It’s on! Let the revolution begin!